You may remember how a few weeks back I mentioned my trip to Denver, CO and how we would soon be moving there.
Well, now it’s official. We’ve found a place, signed the paperwork and are set to move in around August 1. This isn’t just moving down the street; this is a big, serious move two states away with all of our belongings and two kids under the age of 4. Yikes.
We’re moving because of my husband’s job { more details here }, which is kind of nice because with him already being employed and me able to work from anywhere, one piece of the moving-to-a-new-state puzzle is already solved.
Having a place to live also eases some of my anxieties – although I haven’t even seen it in person yet, because my husband flew out there to do house hunting alone…. I still can’t believe I let him choose the place we would rent for the next couple of years without even seeing it – I am generally sooo Type-A. But I didn’t feel that my OCD about house details was worth the price of another plane ticket – sometimes frugality wins over my craziness.
Now it’s onto packing, cleaning, purging, setting up utilities, canceling utilities, changing our address, blah, blah, blah – you know, all of that fun stuff that comes with moving. Truth be told, I’m less worried about the logistics than I should be. My biggest fear? The fact that we don’t know a soul.
We’ve got friends of friends and people we vaguely remember from years ago who live in and around Denver, but no one that we are close to. We will be leaving behind both of our parents (who are also our main babysitters and a huge source of help), siblings, and our closest friends who have become our family over the years.
I am sad and I am nervous. I am pretty shy and making friends is a slow process for me. Most of my friends have been in my life for 10+ years. Now I have to start over… (not that I will be losing my old friends, but finding new ones close by will be important, too).
I will say, however, that I feel like God has been grooming me for this time in our lives over the last few years. Stepping out of my comfort zone and attending conferences like Blissdom all on my own and meeting new people have been huge stepping stones for me and allowed me to realize that maybe I’m not as shy I always thought.
Isn’t it funny that even in adulthood we worry about fitting in and making friends? Am I really 29 and nervous about meeting new people? I am too old for this, aren’t I?
In school it seemed so easy; you are surrounded by the same people every day whether you like them or not, and eventually friendships form thanks to proximity and that inevitable “click” of personalities. Even in the workplace you tend to form relationships rather organically. But seeing as to how I don’t work in an office but am instead surrounded by a teething toddler and a hormonal preschooler day in and day out, I guess relying on coworker camaraderie is off the table.
So what’s my plan? My first order of business is to find a church that we feel is a good fit, and force ourselves to get plugged in. I’ll be personable and friendly, even if it kills me (ok, perhaps that’s a bit dramatic). I can do it, I can be friendly and chatty and try to make friends, it’s just emotionally exhausting for me to be social. Does anyone else have that problem? I can remember coming home from church on Sundays back when we were really involved in our small church and feeling so tired from being “on” that I literally needed a nap.
My husband is friendly, though rather reserved. At least he’s better at small talk than I am (“so… how about that weather?” – my go-to) I wish we were one of those outgoing, makes-friends-so-easily kinds of couples. But unfortunately we’re more like the stay-at-home-watch-another-episode-of-dexter-and-then-go-to-bed kinds of couples. Darn.
If any of you have ever made a huge move like this and experienced starting over, please tell me how you did it! And pray for me, friends, as we go on this new adventure.